THE CHRISTMAS SEASON MASSACRE *** USA 2002 Dir: Jeremy Wallace. 70 mins

A mean-spirited Yuletide parody of 80’s slasher flicks from U.S. indie horror outfit Sub Rosa, this is rife with nudity, gore and a free-wheeling sense of fun. Set in broad daylight in “Christmas Town”, California on Christmas Eve (with jingling bells heralding the killer’s presence), it documents the vengeful killing spree of a smelly, poor kid cruelly nicknamed “One Shoe McGroo” at school. Growing up bitter and twisted and still sporting the pirate’s eye patch he got for Christmas as a kid, One Shoe offs surviving classmates at a festive reunion.

This nods frequently to classic slashers (notably FRIDAY THE 13TH) but has a zesty charm all of its own, and an amusing cast of sub-genre archetypes, including a busty bimbo named Abby Honeydew who spends the whole film in her underwear and takes part in a spoof shower scene accompanied by a radio DJ narrating erotic recipes (“beautiful white jiggling dough…”). There is one genuinely nasty sequence involving a female character tied to a tree, alongside plenty of funny drunken small talk (“Is fish meat?” / “Fish is fish!”). Plus: the original song “A Pirate’s Christmas” is catchy as hell.

Review by Steven West


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