WICKED WITCHES (a.k.a. The Witches Of Dumpling Farm) ** UK 2018 Dir: Martin J Pickering 80 mins
Mark Griffiths (Duncan Casey) has been kicked out by his wife, entirely his fault yet he doesn’t seem that remorseful and after ditching his wedding ring on the tarmac he returns to his old digs out in the Welsh countryside, Dumpling Farm. A place that holds many memories for Mark of partying, getting high and good friends. The only friend left living at the farm is Ian (Justin Marosa) who Mark notices is acting really strangely. As soon as he is back Mark starts experiencing bad dreams and having off feelings about the place. The reasons behind all this strange activity become clear as the farm is taken over by flesh eating witches with Mark and his group of friends being their targets.
The story is pretty weak, it’s very disjointed and as the film comes to its finale it feels like they are trying to cram in every familiar trope possible in the hope that someone might find something a bit scary, whether it makes sense or is suited to the theme doesn’t seem to be their concern . It’s also quite drawn out with pointless lingering scenes of countryside, village shops, car parks, cars, fire and gloomy trips through mazes of tunnels. Thankfully the dialogue is quite sparse in this which is a god send as it foregoes the cheesy one liners for a change.The worst performance coming from Marosa as Ian who is that painful to watch you actually feel embarrassed for him. Duncan Casey is fairly pleasing on the eye and not as bad an actor as the others.
The witches themselves don’t seem to do a lot and they don’t talk other then to chant a bit. I have to admit that when they reveal their true selves they do look cool with coal black eyes and a gob full of very pointy teeth that they use to tear off limbs, gouge a few eyes and munch on a lot of intestines. This is no bad thing in my opinion but seems more zombieish than witchy but if this is their take on the subject then I approve. The FX for its low budget are not that bad either and the soundtrack is quite a lively mix of different genres which goes some way to making this bearable. Due to the bad acting and terribly slow pace of this it is not something I would willingly watch again.
Review by Sarah Budd